Small adjustment

There are many adjustments necessary when we become widows. A seemingly small one has to do with filling out forms. Name, address, date of birth, phone number, etc.

We’ve filled these out all of our adult lives and it has become pretty automatic – until the first time after the death of our spouse.  When we reach the part that says MARITAL STATUS. We look at the choices: MARRIED  SINGLE  WIDOWED. If we still consider ourselves to be married, our pen might go back and forth as we realize our category isn’t listed. If it was listed, what might it say? MARRIED THOUGH TEMPORARILY SEPARATED? MARRIED IN SPIRIT?  Rationally we might realize what they want to know. Emotionally it can be difficult to check WIDOWED or not to check MARRIED. I know one widow who still checks that one. And why not? Why are they asking? Especially in this century. What do the single people living together check? This has almost become a meaningless question. Maybe that widow who checks married is right.

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